I got an email today from my best friend. It made me laugh. It is all about woman thing. It is funny but there are truth in them. Ihope it will make you a little laugh when you read this.

Pregnancy, Estrogen, and Women

PREGNANCY Q & A & more!

Q: Should I have a baby after 35?

A: No, 35 children is enough.

Q : I’m two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?

A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q : What is the most reliable method to determine a baby’s sex?

A: Childbirth.

Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she’s borderline irrational.

A: So what’s your question?

Q : My childbirth instructor says it’s not pain I’ll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?

A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?

A: Right after you find out you’re pregnant.

Q : Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?

A: Not unless the word ‘alimony’ means anything to you.

Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?

A: Yes, pregnancy.

Q : Do I have to have a baby shower?

A: Not if you change the baby’s diaper very quickly.

Q : Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.

‘ESTROGEN ISSUES’

10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE ‘ESTROGEN ISSUES’

1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.

2. You’re adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet.

3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.

4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.

5. You ‘re using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says: ‘How’s my driving-call 1- 800-’.

6. Everyone’s head looks like an invitation to batting practice.

7. Everyone seems to have just landed here from ‘outer space.’

9. You’re sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.

10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.

TOP TEN THINGS ONLY! WOMEN UNDERSTAND

1. Cats’ facial expressions.

2. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors.

3. Why bean sprouts aren’t just weeds.

4. Fat clothes.

5. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time.

6. The difference between beige, ecru, cream, off-white, and eggshell.

7. Cutting your hair to make it grow.

8. Eyelash curlers.

9. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made.

A newly born baby delivered at home. He is my cousin’s son. I was her midwife. She had a long labor and delivery but everything went well by God’s grace. He is very cute. He is now 1 year and 5 months. It feels so great to be there with them when he came out.

The other night was my last birth shift. It seemed like the patients wants to say goodbye to me, so they all came in my shift. We had a very long night shift. There were 2 babies born, the other one was transported to the hospital for Respiratory Distress. We also had complicated postpartum patients and we sutured 3 patients. That shift it seemed like it took forever. We got to rest hours of rest then back to work again and prepared for endorsement. I am so thankful that shifts will always end. I was able to sleep the following day.

I want to share these pictures as tribute to all the mothers. Pictures are kind of blurry, the camera was not set in the right mode but I love these. These are one of those moments that I’ve treasured in my life. This was taken 2 years ago. I delivered my cousin’s 2nd baby, a home delivery. Her first baby (I also delivered, home birth) was there during the birth. As you can see in the first picture, she was touching her mother’s forehead as she was asking her if it was painful. I really can tell that she was sharing the pains with her mother. The second picture, she was looking at and acquainting her new brother. The third picture, is the best. She kissed her mom and her brother was looking at them. It’s wordless. It was one of those precious and wonderful time I have as a nurse-midwife. I really appreciate and salute all the mothers in the world, you are all awesome and amazing. Happy mother’s day.

A midwife friend of mine wrote me an email today. She told me that she delivered her sister’s baby. There was a complication of delivery called shoulder dystocia. Shoulder dystocia happened when the shoulders is stuck up way up high to the pubic bone. The baby’s head is out but it will take some manuever or management to let the whole body to come out. Thanks God the delivery went well. The exciting thing there aside from  having a new baby was, my friend is also pregnant, she is 36 weeks pregnant one or two weeks more she will have her baby. Pretty sure there was an andrenaline rush. I am so proud of her.

In my field of practice as a nurse-midwife, I have been caring for pregnant women and delivering babies. I have seen many women who have problems like dis-aligned perineal structure and genital prolapse due to laceration from their previous deliveries that was not sutured or not carefully sutured. I had one patient who underwent vagina surgery and vaginal relaxation because it really bothers her after she delivered her first baby. After surgery it improved her health and quality of life. Many doctors who are experts on vaginal or bladder surgery like Dr. Miklos and Dr. Moore. They are committed to help women through their gynenicology surgical care expertise.

Today I work day shift. There was no patient being endorsed to us. It was not a perfect day for me because I had an allergies. My nose was runny and I got teary-eyed. So I took some anti-allergy drugs. It made me so drowsy and sleepy. I was so glad that I was able to sleep for an hour. We were so board cause nothing kept us busy. Then finally, 30 minutes before endorsement time a labor came in. It is her 5th baby. She came in active labor and was check, she was already 8cm when she came 2 cm more to go then she will be pushing her baby. At exactly 2pm, her BOW or water ruptured then she pushed twice then baby’s head was already visible. After 5 minutes baby was out! First baby boy in the family!! The baby is named after her Father, Joseph Jr. Every one was happy.

Me and my co-midwives. We delivered two babies during our shift. It was so fun. Nothing can compare the joy of catching babies. It is really our privilege to be the first ones to touch them. I feel so glad that I work with the people I love.